Online sex chats without paying how plentyoffish conquered online dating
Based on decades of both research and clinical experience in treating sexually based anxieties, inhibitions, and compulsions in men, I think I can explain some of the deeper motivations involved.But I want to be careful to make two things clear at the outset: The first is that I don't know a thing about the specific issues with which Mr. Any psychotherapist worth his or her salt should cringe at so-called "experts" who, without any direct contact with the "patient," seek to analyze the real Anthony Weiner in the media.One man, a successful attorney, was drawn to younger woman because youth symbolized (to him) an eagerness and lightness of being unblemished by the disappointments and wear and tear of life.Youth, then, functioned as an unconscious antidote to his real view, one acquired in childhood, of women as unhappy and impossible to please, a view that was chilling in the bedroom.For some, the fact that Anthony Weiner exercised terrible judgment, humiliated himself, and potentially hurt the Democratic Party is all that matters.
A woman I treated who was attractive and confident in her own right gained a similar reassurance from the height and size of the men to whom she was attracted.
And third, the women with whom a man corresponds, and the sexual scripts he most highly prefers, can be selected for and are under the man's relative control.
If the other person doesn't "fit the bill" and doesn't want to play in the prescribed ways, that connection can be deleted and another, more appropriate, one is available to take its place.
The deeper appeal lies in three areas unique to the digital world: First, the man enjoys connections with lots of (in this case) women.
His barriers to connectedness are thus overcome and his loneliness is temporarily alleviated. And in a relationship between objects, no one is truly dependent, dissatisfied, or unhappy.